Mobfd

That Song on the Radio is Nice

Dusky Panther’s Saturday Morning Cartoon

Click pic for Gif Round-up

Hey Monsters! I write a satirical baseball blog called Bottom of the Fourth. I thought this post fit well with the Monsters’ interests. Enjoy!ST. LOUIS (Bottom of the Fourth) – Desperate for some good news after a tumultuous month that has seen stars Adam Wainwright and Matt Holliday go down with injuries, the St. Louis Cardinals have made a bold move and hired Charlie Sheen to liven up the clubhouse, among other things.The Cardinals, widely expected before the season to contend for the NL Central crown, didn’t start the season the way they hoped to, dropping two of three games to the Padres this weekend. GM John Mozeliak said that Sheen will help the team to stop “losing” and start “being victorious”.Sheen’s official title remains unspecified at the moment, but his responsibilities are expected to include warming up the crowd, delivering a “third-inning rant”, and closing.Some pundits have criticized the move, noting Sheen’s recently-revealed unique traits don’t mesh with those of the Cardinals. CNN’s Leslie Bank weighed in on the topic. “It’s a well-established fact that Mr. Sheen a) is a warlock and b) has tiger blood. Neither of these attributes has anything to do with a small red bird. For example, warlocks and cardinals may share the faculty of flight, but that’s about where the comparison ends.”Ms. Bank went on to point out that the nature of Sheen’s blood makes him better suited to a position with the Detroit Tigers. Ironically, Detroit was the disastrous first stop on Sheen’s Torpedo of Truth tour, where he was unceremoniously booed off the stage.The Cardinals plan to use Sheen’s superstar status to plan new promotions for the 2011 season. The traditional “Ladies’ Night” will be replaced by “Goddess’ Night”, at which all women attending will be entered into a draw to “spend some quality time at a super 8″ with Sheen. Jimmy Wei, the Cardinals’ director of promotions, expects the prize to include “a nice dinner and maybe some pool time”, but notes that Sheen was “adamant about the wording” and that “ultimately, it’s up to him.”Some outside observers are amused by the obvious parallels between the Cardinals and Sheen. Aramis Ramirez of the division rival Chicago Cubs spoke to the media after the announcement, calling the Cardinals and Sheen “a super-train-wreck deserving of each other”. The Cubs’ right-fielder elaborated, saying “okay, it’s like this. First the Cardinals train crashed with another train, making a train-wreck. Then the Charlie Sheen train crashed with a fourth train, making a second train-wreck. But the train-wrecks still had momentum toward each other, and weren’t too far apart, so then they crashed and made a super-train-wreck. Was that not clear? It’s pretty common in the Dominican Republic.”Sheen’s Torpedo of Truth Tour, which has garnered unanimously negative reviews, is expected to continue with a modified itinerary based around the Cardinals’ schedule. Sheen fans are already flocking to St. Louis, and experts believe that within 48 hours the city will eclipse Los Angeles, Miami and, of course, the entire state of New Jersey, as the “Douchiest Place in America”.

REALTALK: I read Christian fiction. Not all the time but enough to be a totally embarrassing point of interest.

More specifically, Christian romance novels. They mostly read like lighthearted lifetime movies about career gals who realize they secretly want to be married. Only also they pray about it, and the prayers are usually italicized. More…

One hundred and twenty hours, plus. That’s five full days. A work week, and then the drinking afterward. It’s 7200 minutes, about the time it takes for you to get your arm stuck under a rock and then cut yourself free off (but, you know, I’m bad at estimates). It’s also incidentally the amount of time I spent playing Dragon Age: Origins.

I’m not bragging or trying to show how iBig my eDick is, but I really enjoyed Dragon Age: Origins. Enough to play it more than two times. There was a certain draw of the (finally NOT Lord of the Rings) high fantasy – dragons and mages and swords and dwarves – that I just fell in love with. It was fully engrossing, and I became frightfully lost in Dragon Age’s world.

More…

R.I.P. Your Productivity

Extra Special gif Round-Up – Colbert sings Friday

Twitterdare #2: Tweet a picture of your underwear

In this episode of MTT we honor a true patriot. A monster that stood for justice and freedom when the world needed it most. A brave beacon of hope that carried liberty and strenght to all nations that requested. Of course, I am talking about my penis (APRIL FOOLS YOU GUYS!!! Also, that is the first of many dick jokes headed your way so strap on). The actual subject of tonight’s episode is none other than Super_glue.  Read more…

Concert Addict’s  gif Round-Up

I’d Hit That: Dave Grohl

Legends of Note: Leonard Cohen

So, after I wrote all that shit last night I got inspired. #humblebrag. I put together this really awesome salad by using the rules of flavor balancing. This is the base:

2 cups pineapple, diced (approx. 1 small)
1 cup mango, diced (approx. 1 medium)
1 medium avocado, diced
1/3 lb. grape tomatoes, cut in half
2 Tbl lime juice
2 Tbl. olive oil
1/2 tsp. salt (or to taste)

The neat thing is that it is technically a fruit salad, but is eaten as a savory component. So you can totally be that douchebag who’s all, “Here’s my play on fruit salad.” and your guests/significant others go “Oh. Because tomatoes and avocados are technically fruits. Total lol, I’m sure.”

You generally think of fruit salads as sweet, since they contain fruit, which is generally sweet (duh). By adding the lime juice and tomato an additional acidic component is introduced that cuts some of the sweetness. The addition of the salt also further cuts the sweetness and brings out the other flavors inherent in the fruits. Likewise the avocado adds a very slight sourness and, of course, the delicious unctuousness that avocado brings to everything.

I was having tacos last night, so to go with more of a mexican flavor profile I added 2 Tbl. chopped cilantro and 1 seeded and chopped jalapeño.

What’s cool about this is that these flavors can work really well with other types of cuisines. For a more Vietnamese take, add the Mexican ingredients, but substitute fish sauce for the salt and add some chopped fresh mint as well. For an Indian take, substitute lemon for lime juice, cayenne for jalapeño, and maybe add a dash of garam masala. The possibilities are limitless! Not really. But generally, if you see overlap in ingredients between cuisines, you can usually be relatively successful by altering the external “flavoring” components to make a dish fit a particular type of ethnic flavor profile. As always, feel free to experiment and please let me know if you have any questions!

R.I.P. Your Productivity